Ramadhan oh Ramadhan

Ramadhan, kau datang lagi membawa makna yang mendalam dalam hidupku...

Alhamdulillah! Ramadhan's here again and I'm so grateful to be able to meet this month. Of late, with regards to deaths of Muslim celebrities and also my arwah Nek Long... marked the end of them meeting Ramadhan this year. It also marks a new Ramadhan for me as a new mother to my infant.

I had been thinking, would I be able to handle Ramadhan this year? Being a full b-feeding mum, I wasn't sure how I would take it. Most of my 'free time' at work has been booked for this personal mission of mine such that I lack in completing my admin work (markings, etc). It was such a breeze earlier this year when I wanted to clear those tasks before the relief teacher comes in. I could settle marking those books/worksheets/etc. after class and after my working time. Nowadays, it is such a challenge and my stuffs keep piling and I had to chase time instead.

I even had to find space for lunch and usually I'd multi-task doing work and lunch at the same time. One thing for sure, since Ramadhan has come, there's no need to buy lunch. But just a matter of whether I can handle myself and not suffer dehydration due to the pumpings and energy sucked up from me by pupils.(hah)

This leads to one important point. I'd treasure Ramadhan and hope that I'll be able to complete one whole month since my period has not come.

So on the 1st day of Ramadhan....

-Woke up at 4.30 to cook pasta @ own home.
- Iman was fast asleep without any distraction.
- Around 5.15 woke hubb sahur.
- 6 plus wanted to perform my Subh prayers and Qur'an recitation. (I was hoping at this juncture to complete the whole mashaf since I thought with the complete fast given to me)

And Allah knows best because it has come... This is a perfect way to say 'Kita yang merancang, Allah yang tentukan...'

The new term

The first day of work landed me in an 'alhamdulillah' situation. I was expecting more than that. But I admit, there were a few changes, from some admin changes due to the pandemic to the new faces at work. There were also some addition to the department I'm in.

I failed in my attempt of creating a scheduled daily timetable for the whole week as a career woman. It was supposed to be a timetable of my daily routine as a BF-ding mum especially the time at work. I'm glad that with the current session I'm in, I am able to use the time to pump my milk. I even find a good place to pump it as long as no other people need the place. Given the fridge for my milk storage in the pantry, I felt a sense of syukur. Unlike some other mummy friends who need to buy a mini-fridge to store theirs. But like my aunt told me, and agreeing with her that my workplace should have a BFing room for mums who are high on their pumping routine. I mean, the hotbed I'm at is a female domination.

There were some glitches and challenges at the moment while trying to cover my four deferred papers. What I can say is that the challenge has started ever since I enquired about the status of my exams until present time. Alhamdulillah with His Grace, I covered one last Sunday and the other last night. I admit that having to take these papers when my leave has ended brings me back to square one. Whatever it is, I think Allah has His reasons of letting me be in this situation although efforts had been done to take it during my leave. I do not know when my next 2 papers are. Ahead this weekend will the submission of my group assignment which is still in the process of adding information. Not to be missed is the mid-term test of my short sem on Studies of Religion.

I am looking forward to the nuptial knot of my dear Huda this weekend, on which I am sure of is something that she has been waiting for all this time...

Majlis Kesyukuran ~ 060609

A nice date for a more than only a nice moment. It signified a more responsible future, to be more independent in the years to come and to feel the meaning of adulthood, like how our parents used to experience during their transition period.

And so we had our do'a selamat / majlis kesyukuran for Iman, which was the initial plan (He had his tahneek @ the mosque. So no cukur rambut @ home). But since we bought the new house and it was spacious for the occasion, we decided to make it a housewarming event too for family members and close ones.

Iman was well-behaved that day. Me and hubb thought that he was paying his overdue sleeping time as he had only been sleeping half an hour or even 10 minutes for the past week. That really took up my personal time as mak and me had to 'layan' him as he loves to stand and be carried around the house. He slept for 4 hours and woke up, after which he was passed around and only cried during feeding time.

I hardly ate that day, only to realise I missed out on some of the yummy food and delicacies at night. Was just too busy entertaining guests and quenching my thirst most of the time.

Cake brought by Cik Midah

I miss Wawan! And not to forget, the newly-wed Didi just back from honeymoon

A few of us


When the March brothers collide.. huhuh..

Alhamdulillah it went well. Hopefully this house will be a place for us to fill it with Mahabbah and Rahmah and insyaAllah rumahtangga Da'wah...

* * *

Tawazun Dalam Rumahtangga.

Berumahtangga juga bagi seorng daie adalah bertujuan untuk melaksanakan ubudiyah dan bukan untuk menghalangnya. Adalah disedari bahawa terdapat banyak ujian dan fitnah yang terdapat dalam rumahtanggga. Salah satu daripada ciri penting rumahtangga dakwah adalah keseimbangan atau tawazun.

Keseimbangan ini adalah :

a)Di antara kecintaan kepada isteri dan anak-anak dengan kecintaan kepada Allah dakwah dan jihad.

b)Diantara kecintaan kepada keselesaan hidup bersama keluarga dengan kesungguhan berdakwah di tengah tengah masyarakat yang sangat mencabar.

c)Diantara kecenderungan untuk memberikan kesenangan hidup keluarga dengan harta benda dengan tuntutan berbelanja ke jalan Allah SWT.

Para du’at perlu melalui dengan bersungguh-sungguh untuk menatijahkan keseimbangan ini kerana ramai para duat yang gugur di perjalanan dakwah kerana kegagalan mereka melahirkan keseimbangan ini dan kegagalan mereka mendidik isteri dan anak-anak untuk menerima serta melaksanakan keseimbangan ini.

anakkusoleh@wordpress

Wide awake

It's 2.05am in the morning and I don't feel sleepy at all. Maybe I've surpassed the 'sleep mode'. I've been hitting the books and surfing the net for my assignment for the module Study of Religions. Given 4 days to search for info, I asked my team member for an extra day due to my weekend paintworks @ the new abode. So, I have only 2 days to complete the draft of this assignment on B.u.d.d.hi.s.sm and yet to look into the critical analysis of the subject. That'll be later today, insyaAllah.

Working in a school, I feel blessed to have hubb to borrow the books I need at his school library. In a way, that saves my time scouting for resources and with Iman around in a library, puts me on an alert mode if he wails unpredictably.

Iman won't be awake anytime now. Perhaps at 4am? But what makes me happy, in a way is the fact that hubb will be home for 2 weeks due to his surgery! This means, that I'll have company till the 1st of June. So everyday seems like a Sunday to him? Heh...

My house is 99% complete and I can't wait to decorate! Just excited that I was able to choose the colours for our house (with hubb's agreement of course). I am currently searching for the right accessories and scheme of colours to blend in with the wall, to create a wonderful ambience that I call home. If you're asking what concept I'm aiming for? Minimalist.

Baby gifts

People can really be creative when it comes to gifts. It was last year, if I'm not mistaken. The deejay interviewed two women in the online business. One of them dealt with diaper cakes. I was really oblivious as to what that meant..'What? How can a cake be a diaper? You can't eat a diaper?' I've heard of diaper bags, of course. Much to my curiosity, I googled for diaper cakes just now and wanted to witness the look of a diaper cake. (Who said that internet invites evil? I'm gaining knowledge now. Just an opinion for those who said that internet is bad when I watched Jus! on S.u.ri.a today. Perhaps, they are the ones who are not exposed to the cyberworld, hmm..)

Back to my topic of creativity, I've been wanting to show a picture of this creative juice as a gift to Iman. A gift from my hubby's side. It's the most unique baby gift of all, because of the personal touch it has. Felt so 'sayang' to dismantle after all the hard work. But I love it!

The white and blue roses are actually Iman's clothes! Neat, huh?

Bought the book!

I've purchased the book hubby collected for me @ Bugis on the way home from work (Thanks dear!). Asked for a transfer from the main store because of the location. The one Yati shared with me is the 1st edition. This is the 3rd one with additional info. It's bigger and slightly heavier than the former.

Why the book? Well, random reads from Yati's hooked me on reading further. I felt that I have to own one as a reference in case I forget some facts about BF and I know I have to return the book to her asap. Part of the content includes a sample schedule of a working BF mother and her children. So if she could do it while tending to more than one child, why not me? I would just customize it to my current needs of a working mum later on. It's the info on working mums that made me hunt for the book. Thanks Yati dear for the book (Will return it to you when we meet soon!)

What's up ?

It has been almost 2 months... with all the hoo-haas of childrearing. I've learnt quite a number of things - from advices of others to the books I read...

+ Stocking up milk has so far been endless. I'm just worried that once I resume work, the stock I kept might not be enough. I have to start finding a way to pump at least once at work according to my timetable.

+ The BF book that Yati lent to me was very useful. I thought of buying one for myself.

+ Am still finding the most comfortable method to BF Iman while shopping. I have experienced using the sling or nothing. So far it has been successful but I wasn't that comfortable due to some personal reasons. But I'm not giving up. Just have to keep on practising.

+ Iman had his nails cut! Despite having short nails, he still wear mittens due to the mild red lines he made without it.

+ As of today, the reno work is a week and 1 day. Both me and hubby are still scouting for the necessary things for our house.

Syukur Alhamdulillah

Salaam to all..

Presenting you...

* Hifzul Iman *
- 2nd of March 2009 -
3kg @ KKH

My birth story to come... insyaAllah...

1 more week to go!

As I am writing my entry here, I wonder whether there are readers out there religiously reading to my posts recently; except uan-kun who has faithfully been tagging me as an acknowledgement (thanks uan!) Perhaps it was due to my hiatus that made some readers go away *giggles*.

Alhamdulillah, my mid-term battles were over with the end of my last paper yesterday. However, I've informed dear ustaz (as the coordinator of the programme) to differ my final papers in late March. I feel the urge to actually try to take the papers but I'm not that confident I'll be able to do that during the confinement period as I am still a virgin in motherhood.

Doc approved the leave to be taken on my EDD. Moreover, I will feel bored at home if I were to take a few days leave. Lucky that EDD falls on Monday so I'll have my weekend break as it is also my BIRK break. Yesterday might be the last day of my studies life at this moment.

On a happier note, I received an unexpected home-made card from my P5 pupils. Actually, they were the ones that I have been challenged emotionally every time I enter the door. These challenging kids, if you know what I mean, are usually the ones that'll shower you with unexpected gifts. Despite their behavioural problems and idiosyncrasies, they may actually be the ones that surprise you with all the wonderful things. I will show you the card, albeit simple in my next entry insyaAllah.

The finishing touches...

I have confirmed the date of my leave. Doc said that i need not take any leave a few days before. I'm fine with it cos I didn't want to waste any leave. Moreover, before my actual day are the weekends. So I have a week more to handover stuffs to my relief provided that she'll able to come next week plus other admin stuffs to settle with the pupils as well. ON the hindsight, I was suppose to conduct the workshop yesterday. At the very last minute, they changed it to staff meeting instead of department, so again, I had to postpone the workshop. This is what they say, we plan but God decides. So, next week is the last chance for me to share something because this initiative involves few levels. I can't rely totally on the others because they have their own tasks. Next week, I hope, I hope...

On the contrary, I received the new stroller last Monday from my cousin! So kind of her to present me with the gift which me and hubb had chosen. Thank you K Erlis! Mak also likes the stroller and its functions. No, it's not quinny, heh too expensive to ask them although they wanted to sponsor any brands.

Yeap, I've packed. But don't think I'll be in labour anytime next week. Huhuh. I'll just let this cute lil one hibernate in my nest for awhile.

Oh-oh-oh

At the last stage of battlefield...

This is the current week of rushing hour where I try my best to settle all the paperwork that I can bear. Trying my best too, to bear the lil one here and there. Keep changing positions in class by sitting at one point, and walking the next.

One more mid-term Part 2 to go this weekend and I hope I'm able to meet that day. But those revisions could only be done @ home, on which I'd end up sleeping on the bed and read halfway.

But I'm feeling so syukur, that I succeeded in completing all the 6 days of fasting I missed during Ramadhan. I wanted to complete them before the lil one comes out. Yesterday was my last! Alhamdulillaah.

At the moment, I really drag waking up because I can't sleep peacefully these days. I would always wake up in the wee hours to change sides. Poor hubb would always be awakened by his 'oh-super-extra-load' wife. So sorry hubb!

I thank you some of you who smsed me and asked about my condition and progress. Alhamdulillah I am doing okay so far. The fact that I am not going to take any leave even a few days before means that I just have to persevere although obviously it doesn't get any easier and I admit I am getting lazier to go to work, because I really have to practise 'Fasbrun Jamil' (patience). The kids really play with your emotions and I really pity my lil one having to endure that part. But luckily I am able to balance these emotions once I return home.

Lil one may just pop anytime now! Hehe... do pray for me my dear readers!

Brains and brawns

I spent yesterday night and most of today to complete my 2nd review article. I was torn in the beginning between two but decided to just choose one which is, not that I would say easier, but more to the safer side. The muscles in my brain have sure worked hard almost to the extent of cracking it. I'm not that confident of this piece I've analysed because along the way, the burning sensations of the upper part of my stomach hinders the flow of ideas and thoughts.

This is the best I could do because I have other obligations to complete before I take a break. My brain is just tired of thinking critically as my body is already tired with the weight I'm carrying. But, all this is of course, a sweet experience. I'm trying to organise things before the time comes and I still have another 2 mid-terms to revise this coming week and the next. However, it is unpredictable nowadays that the pain comes and go, and I am feeling more tired these days. To settle it all at work, since January, I've been staying in school till the pakcik switches off the staffroom's light as a signal for us to get out, heh

As the time comes nearer, I am really counting the days. But before all this starts, I just need to carry out some responsibilities given to me at work and make it a reality. Then will only there be a sign of relief.

Anticipation

Initially, I felt nothing. When people around me asked, how I was feeling, I did not know what to answer. There wasn't much excitement because I think I would prefer to go with the flow and be more composed. It's only recent, or to be exact, these few days that I felt the anticipation and look forward to the day. Maybe because of my surroundings and some people around me sharing their stories that made me like this.

I look forward to it.. yeap... especially when hubb showed me that video of the wonderful creation...

The new member on Planet Earth

After a short weekend date with hubb, we visited a dear girlfriend, whom, after a long waited journey and anticipation, welcomed her new family member yesterday. He has beautiful long eyelashes too, and weighed 3.7kg. Engrossed in her labour story, I forgot to take a shot of the lil angel, but surely the ibu will be updating him in her entry.

To Yati, your prayers of having him in your arms by this week has been fulfilled. Syukur Alhamdulillaah. Hopefully you'll be home soon and have a speedy recovery. Have a good experience of parenting Yati n Rizal!

Kita hanya merancang, tetapi Allah menentukan... That's what I've learnt from her story...

A late new year entry...

The new working year leaves me with a new routine due to the new session we are having this year. It's my 2nd experience being a floater and this, I share with other colleagues of mine although I have to be more aware of the different levels we are assigned to. I remembered that stint I had last year with the sup regarding certain things I felt along the way. Hindrances that pulled me back from being proactive and personality traits of some of them around me that I tried to shun, thus resulting me not able to put plans into practice. I was glad it turned out well because that talk I had between her and me left a deep impression. Since then, I have been able to discuss the important things left earlier, all for the sake of them and able to give voice to one's opinions or sharings with confidence, alhamdulillah.

I am more hyped on this year's organisation of things I plan to keep them in place and with istiqamah. But then come the time when I'll be on hiatus physically for 4 months and having to continue them virtually, I hope I succeed. I have one month plus left insyaAllah before I handover this task to another person and invite another new role to myself. My 2nd phase...

What's most important is the fact that I still have those around me who are still supportive (my family members), my bestfriends and other close ones. I can say that it's a good year to start and anticipating for better things ahead insyaAllah...

90/10 principle

Discover the 90/10 Principle
Author: Stephen Covey

It will change your life (at least the way you react to situations).

What is this principle? 10% of life is made up of what happens to
you. 90% of life is decided by how you react. What does this mean?
We really have no control over 10% of what happens to us.

We cannot stop the car from breaking down. The plane will be late
arriving, which throws our whole schedule off. A driver may cut us
off in traffic.

We have no control over this 10%. The other 90% is different. You
determine the other 90%. How? …By your reaction. You cannot control
a red light. but you can control your reaction. Don't let people
fool you; YOU can control how you react.

Let's use an example.
You are eating breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over
a cup of coffee onto your business shirt. You have no control over
what just happened. What happens next will be determined by how you
react.

You curse.
You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the cup over. She
breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your spouse
and criticize her for placing the cup too close to the edge of the
table. A short verbal battle follows. You storm upstairs and change
your shirt. Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too
busy crying to finish breakfast and get ready for school. She misses
the bus.

Your spouse must leave immediately for work. You rush to the car and
drive your daughter to school. Because you are late, you drive 40
miles an hour in a 30 mph speed limit.

After a 15-minute delay and throwing $60 traffic fine away, you
arrive at school. Your daughter runs into the building without
saying goodbye. After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you
find you forgot your briefcase. Your day has started terrible. As it
continues, it seems to get worse and worse. You look forward to
coming home.

When you arrive home, you find small wedge in your relationship with
your spouse and daughter.
Why? …. Because of how you reacted in the morning.

Why did you have a bad day?

A) Did the coffee cause it?
B) Did your daughter cause it?
C) Did the policeman cause it?
D) Did you cause it?

The answer is "D".
You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you
reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day.

Here is what could have and should have happened.
Coffee splashes over you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently
say, "Its ok honey, you just need to be more careful next time".
Grabbing a towel you rush upstairs. After grabbing a new shirt and
your briefcase, you come back down in time to look through the
window and see your child getting on the bus. She turns and waves.
You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff. Your boss
comments on how good the day you are having.

Notice the difference? Two different scenarios. Both started the
same. Both ended different.

Why?
Because of how you REACTED.
You really do not have any control over 10% of what happens. The
other 90% was determined by your reaction.

Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 principle. If someone says
something negative about you, don't be a sponge. Let the attack roll
off like water on glass. You don't have to let the negative comment
affect you!

React properly and it will not ruin your day. A wrong reaction could
result in losing a friend, being fired, getting stressed out etc.

How do you react if someone cuts you off in traffic? Do you lose
your temper? Pound on the steering wheel? A friend of mine had the
steering wheel fall off) Do you curse? Does your blood pressure
skyrocket? Do you try and bump them? WHO CARES if you arrive ten
seconds later at work? Why let the cars ruin your drive?

Remember the 90/10 principle, and do not worry about it.
You are told you lost your job.

Why lose sleep and get irritated? It will work out. Use your
worrying energy and time into finding another job.

The plane is late; it is going to mangle your schedule for the day.
Why take outpour frustration on the flight attendant? She has no
control over what is going on.

Use your time to study, get to know the other passenger. Why get
stressed out? It will just make things worse. Now you know the 90-10
principle. Apply it and you will be amazed at the results. You will
lose nothing if you try it. The 90-10 principle is incredible. Very
few know and apply this principle.

The result?
Millions of people are suffering from undeserved stress, trials,
problems and heartache. We all must understand and apply the 90/10
principle.

It CAN change your life!!!

My few cents worth:

We are bound to be dominated by our nafs and things get out of hand due to our own actions. Sometimes, in our marriage, we do not favour certain habits of our spouse. We have a choice, haven't we? We may approach in a pleasant way or vice-versa. Both will have two different results.

One more thing, maybe we do not learn enough patience when there are loads of this virtue found in the Qur'an. Are we being ignorant? Complacent?

I myself hope that I'll be able to put more patience in this marriage because I am sure that more challenges are here to stay. Most importantly is to keep reflecting and upgrading ourselves as Muslims so that we'll be able to understand more the meaning of a marriage with mahabbah and rahmah. May Allah be with us through the good and tough times.

The basis of marriage is not just love.. but more to it.

Completing half of your deen

31 Oct 2008 @ 8pm

Affectionately known as Lily to us 11 sekawan, she tied her knot yesterday nite at the MPH with the man of her choice, who fought in the same battle. Knowing her since the childhood years, only got to know her better after her volunteerism in Saff, and currently an usrah sister of mine.

1 Nov 2008 @ 3pm

Liana, a sister whom I've known since her teenage years when she was still in secondary school. We met again face to face, reunited once again during one of the Saff events where she was already an activist there. It's a pleasure to know that after all these years of trials, she has found the man of her dreams, also a Saff brother..

To the both of you, marriage is a wonderful place to be if you learn to understand each other. It needs a lot of patience as you are now dealing with another person, not you alone. It may be tough during the first stage, but keep on learning about one another and appreciate the strengths both of you have as a wife and as a team player... barakallaahu 'alaikum...


"Marriage is not just spiritual communion, it is also remembering to take out the trash. "

~ Joyce brothers.

p.s Pictures will be uploaded later.

Tautan Hati

It was such an escapism from the realities of reading notes. Diverting from the English medium texts, I resumed to my normal routine of reading Malay novels. If you think it's the lovey dovey kind of storyline, sorry can't help you on that. Since it's an Islamic novel which can be labelled as 'Novel Pendidik Jiwa', it's a good outreach medium too. As da'ies you may find this book useful too as it reflects the methodologies of reaching out to different recipients in receiving the true life as a Muslimah, in particular.

I'm not a fast reader, unlike some people who can complete a thick novel in a day. This book has 785 pages. I was quite surprised that I could read 100+ pages for 3 hours after Subuh one fine day when I had my medical leave during Ramadhan. You can read more of the synopsis here. Anyway, the author is a few years younger than me. I really envy such a writer. That is something which I have yet to accomplish myself, but not having enough strength to do so...

Humaira Zakiah's BIG day...

26 Oktober 2008

"A good marriage is one which allows for change and growth in the individuals and in the way they express their love." - Pearl S Buck

The hoopla of wedding affairs has begun with dear Kiah's. Held @ Sultan Mosque and its MPH. It was also a reunion with my Helwaa sisters and discoveries of mummies-to-be along the way...

Alhamdulillah, Kiah had tied the nuptial knot with Syakir, a friend of mine too whom I knew back then as an online friend. More responsibilities coming up and of course, it is not 'I' anymore, but 'We'. InsyaAllah with the experiences she had dealing with marital conflicts, that will help her to achieve marital bliss for a lifetime!

This is for my dearest Huda. You've been missed too. And insyaAllah I will try to update this site of mine the best I can...

Marriage is not about living under the same roof or about two people...

But marriage is also an institution where the renewal of faith for each other and rekindling the sparks remain... ;)

With my Lappy~

91 words

Typing Test

Previously, with the PC.
This, with the laptop. Zero errors.
Namanya menghilangkan stres... Hehe.